K I - M E . B L O G S P O T . C O M

I hate myself for staying at home the whole day.
I hate having no shows to watch on tv, no feedback forms to do and nothing juicy to read on the internet.
I used to love free time where I could just slack and have some alone time but now...
I hate being free.

Blame it on myself for being a smartie-pants and started surfing Friendster. I hate Friendster. If not for Friendster I wouldn't have found anything.

And I hate the internet. I hate blogs. I accidentally stumbled onto a site which I should have never seen in my life.

Although I dread reading that blog, I couldn't make myself close the window because I wouldn't be able to sleep for the whole night if I didn't scrutinize what I found.
But after looking at it, I think I wouldn't be able to sleep either.

Why is everything the same? It's like the same thing had happened to 2 different people that don't know each other.

This shouldn't be affecting me.

Damn those 6 months in Shanghai. It was supposed to help but it didn't.

But after coming back, I met new friends. Although I don't know them well enough yet, I feel that I should take heed of their advice. It's quite obvious that they mean well and want the best for me. I know. Thank you for your concern.

But sometimes things are easier said than done. No matter what, I think I should make my stand clear. I won't allow it to happen. I won't allow myself to go through an emotional wreck again. Once bitten twice shy.

I swear I hate how I'm feeling now. I know whats best but I can't make myself take that path.

I should just act indifferent

And it sucks that have something on tmr. I hate having to act like I'm fine. But I don't want the people around me questioning what's wrong with me.